What Are Your Energy Givers and Energy Takers?
Naming your energy givers vs. your energy takers will give you way more clarity on what’s worth it vs. what’s just noise. We’re talking the energy peeks and valleys of admin overload, difficult holidays, tidy toy rooms, and self-care rituals that you can actually commit to daily.
Listen to Episode 222 on Apple / Spotify / Below
+ Spring Forward is happening March 11-13: doors are open today!
+ Share how this episode landed for you, DM me @kaileenelise
Today’s episode is brought to you by Spring Forward
Spring Forward is a three-day workshop to discover your desires, release what’s holding you back, and create an actionable plan to call it all in. Because with the way this year started, you desperately need to break out of winter blahs and start spring with momentum.
On day 1: you’ll get clear on what matters most in your work, wellness, and self, so you can stop running on autopilot and start moving with intention.
On day 2: you’ll define what you want and design self-care rituals for your days, so alignment isn’t just a feeling, it’s how you live.
On day 3: you’ll map out next steps in work, wellness, and self so you can go forward with clarity and confidence.
And you'll get reflection prompts, planning templates, and guided meditations to support your shifts beyond the workshop.
Put the live calls on your calendar now:
March 11, 12, and 13 from 12-1:30pm CST
Replays will be shared, of course!
Instead of saving another cute “energy givers and energy takers” graphic on Pinterest, take the time to define yours
If you want to actually hit your goals and feel fulfilled as you do, start now by naming your energy givers and energy takers. Because setting goals is great, but you need to know what in your life gives you energy? And what takes it away?
Look at your energy givers and takers in the different areas or zones of your life like work, wellbeing, relationships, self
Or break it down by time of day: morning, afternoon evening
You can also explore them by season and holidays
Or even the season in life you’re in
Find inspiration in my personal energy givers:
In work: writing, supporting clients, collaborating with amazing humans, making money
In wellbeing: daily rituals, moving my body, getting good sleep, delicious food (and wine too!)
In relationships: one-on-one time with my kids, dates with my husband, marco polo with my bestie, girl nights, alone time
In other ways: dressing well, styling my home, reading, watching shows, going to concerts, traveling
Find inspiration in my personal energy takers:
In work: second-guessing, rushing on deadline, having unrealistic expectations
In wellbeing: aiming for perfection, all-or-nothing attitude, emotional eating, skipping workouts
In relationships: multitasking, being on my phone while with my family, searching for outside advice
In other ways: putting things off, scrolling mindlessly, kid clutter, too much admin
Knowing your energy givers and energy takers will give you clarity on what’s worth it to you
It’s a practice that will help you trust your energy when it ebbs and flows. And it will help you achieve your goals in more aligned, sustainable ways.
This is something you can play with today. And you can build on it over time. Start by just naming one. See how this knowledge helps you support yourself through the way energy takers tax your reserves and watch how you can use the energy givers to give you a boost when you need it.
Listen to Episode 222 of Celebrate Cultivate
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Hello, you are listening to Celebrate Cultivate. I am your host, intuition coach, and voice in your earbuds, Kayleen Elise Seuss. Today we are getting into energy givers, energy takers, and how knowing yours will give you clarity. On what's actually worth your energy so that you can finally pitch your dream client feeling confident about what you have to offer.
You can book that personal stylist that you've been stalking on Instagram for months to realign your wardrobe to the woman you are becoming and totally unplug. On the weekends so that you can say yes to Sunday morning donuts with zero guilt about scrolling your email and Instagram as you're enjoying that little special treat.
This episode is inspired by an exercise we do in. Spring forward at the end of day one, but it's also a topic I am in desperate need of revisiting personally, and based on some recent conversations that I've had with clients and this podcast community in the dms, I know that a few of you need to revisit this.
Topic as well. It really makes sense that it's time for us to look at our energy givers and our energy takers in an honest way because there's a new month now we're in March. It's official, it's here. It's like fully happening. A new season is loading, so we're not quite yet to the first of spring, but we're nearing that and.
Overall, there is this like energy shift happening where so many of us are really feeling depleted and down in energy while also wanting to be like moving and grooving and, and getting going with this year. So. Yeah, I mean, we're gonna get into all of this real soon, but before I do, I want to talk a little bit more about Spring Forward because the doors are officially open.
You can sign up right now to join us. It's a three day workshop to determine your desires and work, health and self release, and let go of the emotions and the thought patterns and the limiting beliefs that are holding you back and create a plan. To call in what you actually want for yourself in those areas of work, health and self.
It's happening live on March 11th, 12th, and 13th with calls from noon to one 30 central time, and of course. I am going to share those replays. I'd love to see you on the calls live. The energy and community on those live calls is always such a vibe. Everybody is, you know, just the most lovely people. If you're listening to this, you know I love you and the group is really intimate, so you're gonna get one-on-one attention and guidance from me if you want it.
But also if you're booked, if you're busy during those scheduled calls, joining for the replays is a totally legit move. So if you've been like on the fence and wondering like, ah, should I, shouldn't I? I don't know. I just want you to know that the replays are a really nice experience too. You can watch all cozy and cuddled up.
At night when your house is finally quiet, or you can take the replays at different chunks of time that fit into your day's best. And if you do the replays, of course you can message me on Instagram. Or if you're a current client, we can go back and forth in Voxer so that you're still getting some of that.
You know, recognition and encouragement and bouncing things off of me. If you get stuck or have any questions, I'm happy to, you know, talk through things with you as you're watching the replay. So, like I said, the doors are open today. You can join spring forward at the early bird price of 1 39 through Monday, March 9th, or when the spots sell out.
So I have a limited number of spots, like I said. So if you're interested, if you wanna hop in, do it now and, and. Kind of to talk about like why, why would you wanna join? The focus of Spring Forward is to give you that reset that we all so desperately need right now going into the spring season. I know that school closures and sick days, the weather, the headlines, the Q1 deadlines, all of that.
Stuff along with like trying to recover from the holiday season while also preparing for summer camps and travel and like the rest of this year's calendar it, it just can feel like so off in work and wellbeing and honestly like in your own personal identity connection with yourself. So in our three days together in spring forward, you'll realign your vision and.
Set a strategy to sustain that vision no matter what life throws at you. So there's no homework. There's nothing that you need to do ahead of time or do after the 90 minute sessions. We are focused. It's gonna feel vibey and good. There's meditations and journaling time, but there's also practical application and workshopping through things so that you really do feel like you know what to do after the workshop is over.
It's definitely a business. Write off if you are going to use anything that we. Learn together in your work, which I'm assuming you will, but it's also a reconnection to your heart and to your soul and to what really matters most in your life. And honestly, those are my favorite types of business write offs.
I really don't wanna do anything workshop, you know, coaching wise for me personally, if it's not going to also like fulfill me. Professionally, but also emotionally, spiritually, and all those other things. So if that's something that you are looking for, you'll find it in spring forward. And if you have any questions, you can message me on Instagram.
I'm at Kayleen Elise. The link to join is in the show notes, or you can find it@kayleenelise.com. So like I said, the month of March is here, in case you haven't noticed and. I have been sharing on Instagram that I am feeling a little off. I'm feeling a little off, a little like low energy, just like meh, blah.
And I know that a lot of you are, are feeling that way. Also, I shared last week's episode was that March visioning practice with journal prompts and a card reading. So if you need kind of like a refresh and a reset for the March month, go check that out. It can kind of help you. Get a little bit of insight on what February was for you and, and what March can be.
I think for me personally, we are just in the, like, we are in the heart of like this time in our lives where the kids are so fun. My kids are four, seven, and nine. They're delightful ages. They are such. Major personalities and all of them are different. They are wonderful together. They're wonderful one-on-one.
But you know, like getting ready this morning to get everybody out the door, one of them is melting down, one of them needs their hair done. It's just, it's a lot. It's like, it just feel like so much juggling all of it. And then we had like an important meeting at the school. So then there's that extra heightened.
I, you know, just like feelings of, I gotta get this right. I, I told my husband at, at the end of everything, I was like, okay, you know, I think it's like really hard to be a parent sometimes. And he was like, Y yes, yes, Kele. And then he's rushing off to work and I'm rushing into come. Talk on the podcast and it just feels like no matter how grounded and centered and trusting my energy I am, life just still feels like a lot.
And if I were my own client, I would say yeah, like your life is a lot. And I think that one of the things that naming our energy givers and our energy takers has, it has helped me personally. Not saying in that. Our you and me kind of way. But in the me personally way, it's helped me trust my energy more.
And it's helped me understand that this is kind of like a, I'm in an an ebb for some reason, and it's not like I am not doing anything. I'm just not doing the things that I thought I had mapped out for myself to do this in my, in my month, you know, in my calendar when I have a to-do list, a lot of stuff doesn't get done, but then other things are getting done.
So it's like. This weird kind of muddly situation and it, it feels like I'm speaking in vague terms, but that's because it sort of just feels kind of vague and maybe it's hormones, maybe it's just like life and my mood and whatever. But I have learned over time through this practice of journaling with my intuition every morning in coaching clients for.
What, five Coming on six years now and trusting their intuition, leading workshops like Spring Forward, like over this long practice of trusting my inner WA voice. I've learned that when you have an energy ebb, like it doesn't mean. There's a defect happening. It doesn't mean that you gotta burn it all down and start over it.
It might, it could, but that's a pretty rare circumstance. What's more common and more likely, is that things are shifting. The energy is, is moving and. The seasons will shift. Like everything's going to shift, things will happen. I will continue to move forward. I'll get that excitement and zest for my assigned to-do list, or I won't, and I will learn how to assign new to-dos to myself in a way that feels good and aligned, maybe through doing the exercises in spring forward, right?
So. That's a little bit about like where I am personally. We are planning spring break trips. We are figuring out our summer travel plans, the kids' summer camps, like doing a bunch of health appointments and admin type things and you know, making sure that I. Well, I'm recording this on Monday, March 2nd.
You'll be listening to it on Thursday the fifth. You know I'm getting, we're gonna go vote tomorrow. I gotta read up on that and make sure, I know there's just, I feel like there's so much that you like need to do to be like a good, healthy, aligned. Citizen these days and you know, the internet would, would have all of us believe that none of us are doing enough.
And so I think also being able to identify your personal energy givers and your personal energy takers helps find a grounded footing of like, okay, you know, some things do just take a lot out of you. There's nothing wrong with that. You know, it's, it's, it's okay. It's just is. It's just true. And getting honest and identifying those things can help alleviate some of the tension and pain and anxiety and frustration so that over time, maybe it will be a less acute energy taking that's happening.
So. What are they? As always, I'm gonna tell you, it is important for you to define energy giver and energy taker as a concept for yourself because all of these things are just ideas for us all to explore together in something like spring forward or in private coaching, but also just as a community here on the podcast.
So just what does that mean to you? For me? The concept of an energy giver is something that when I do it or I experience it, or it's done, to me, I leave feeling elevated, but also the experience of it is kind of more elevated. It's enjoyable, it's exciting, it feels nice. The flip side of that is the energy takers, which for me is like, oh, you know, like.
Just like, oh man, I gotta do that. And it doesn't mean it's awful or bad. Maybe, you know, some of those awful bad things are definitely energy takers, but even just more on like a everyday life type situation. You know, if you think about how your household runs certain, if you're, if you're running the household all by yourself, then you know there are certain tasks that you have.
That you can kind of get by and manage totally fine. And there's other things that just feels like you do not want to do it. And then if you're in a partnership, then some, you know, some people are really totally fine with doing dishes and some people hate doing dishes. Some people are totally fine doing laundry.
Some people hate doing laundry. So kind of just identifying that we all have these different things that give us energy and take energy. It's, it's very useful to be able to name them because then it gives you some context and it gives you some understanding for, for what you're working with. One way to look at your energy givers and your energy takers is in containers in like little.
Tidy little boxes. Don't. We love being able to put something in a box. It is very useful. Also, we have to understand that most of our boxes are permeable. They're flexible, they change. Sometimes we shove too many things in one box, and then it all explodes and spills over, and the rest of the boxes don't have any room.
But if you wanna think about it like the different areas of your life, work. Wellbeing relationships, self, like those four different areas, you're gonna have different energy givers and energy takers in each area. And or you could break it down by like the time of day, like in your morning, there's energy givers and takers.
In the afternoon there's energy givers and takers, and in the evening there's energy givers and takers. You could also look at it in time as seasons. So in spring you have certain energy givers and takers, and in autumn. It might look different. Also, another way to look at it is in the seasons of life that you're in.
So now that I am very clearly out of the baby days, like my youngest is four and a half, we're not having anymore. I think I've mentioned that a few times on the podcast. I feel like I'm saying it more lately, maybe as a way to like own it as truth. It just feels so significantly different than. Any other time.
I've had a 4-year-old, so it's my, you know, I have three kids. This is my third time having a 4-year-old, and it's like the bookend, like, it's like the, the road stops here. Obviously the road keeps going, but like the having more Babies Road is, it's ended and so. When I look at seasons of Life, the season of life that I'm now entering a new season, it's different than the one that I was in hard to name energy givers and takers in this new season of life that I'm in, because I don't really have my arms wrapped around it.
I don't really know what season I'm in 'cause it's kind of like shifting, but I can. Easily look at that baby season of getting pregnant, of nursing babies, of being up late at night, of kind of figuring out what I wanted to do in my career, like pivoting. All of that stuff was like a specific season, and there were certain energy givers and takers in that season of life that don't really exist now.
It does still help to name those and identify those maybe in a formal way through journaling or coaching or something like that, or just like from time to time recognizing like, oh, I really did not like, and it was really hard for me to do X with little babies, but Y came very easily to me. So an example would be like, and it changed, you know, it changed with different kids and that sort of thing.
Like I had, I really struggled with our first and our oldest, like knowing how to. Call it when I had done enough for the baby and it was time to just put the baby down and see if he could cry a little bit and then go to sleep. Like getting him to sleep was a huge task. And I had so much anxiety wrapped around like how long he was gonna sleep, and it was like a, it was a grade of like, did I do a good job putting him down for a nap based on how he slept Now?
I know that was taking a lot of energy from me. I do not have that current situation in my life anymore. And through subsequent children learned, that really wasn't like no one was grading it. That wasn't a measure of my success as a mother. Like that was really just like an independent situation of him.
And me learning and all of it, right? But it drained so much of my energy. But that, that chapter's done, like that energy taker, is no longer a concern of mine. And it does feel oddly healing, oddly like validating to even just voice it to you right now. So thinking about those things could be helpful for you if you're feeling.
A little adrift, a little lost, a little overwhelmed. Naming your energy givers and takers for this particular season of life that you're in or one that you're coming out of can be useful. And then of course there's also just like broad strokes overview, you as a human on planet earth. Some things give you energy, some things take your energy.
For me, personally, having daily rituals that I enjoy. Is a, a big energy giver. Now granted every single day, do I love to the maximum level of love, all of my daily rituals? No, but the idea of practicing something daily like my morning. Journaling ritual that I'm like very into right now. I don't know if I'm gonna be into it every day for the rest of my life, but that is such a energy giver, and even when I'm kind of tired or don't really feel like it, or would rather just get on my computer and start working through emails or on my to-do list, like I still ground myself in that daily ritual because I know that ultimately it is going to give me energy.
Alone time is a big energy giver in the season of life that I'm in right now. That may not be true once all of my children are grown and I have an abundance of alone time, but my alone time is very, very like true alone time. It's very rare. Dressing nicely, dressing well, feeling good in my clothes, gives me a lot of energy, supporting my clients, having.
Aligned clients that I am just like so in love with, that are so dreamy that are just like the clients for me, supporting them and helping them listen to that. I feel weird saying them. It's like, you, you are my dream clients. Like every one of you listening, who I work with or will be working with someday, like this community supporting you and, and, and pouring, I.
Diaz and resources and suggestions and just tiny tweaks and redirecting back to intuition and all of that, like it's just, it really does give me energy. So I'm, I'm so grateful for you and I'm so grateful for that, but also even naming it and talking about it right now, like gives me an elevated energy.
Maybe we should have talked through my energy takers first that I could've. Like talked about the things that drain me and then talked about my energy givers, but some of my energy takers are rushing from thing to thing. This is a newly identified concern. New as in like the last several years, but the.
The tendency to rush is deeply ingrained within me. The tendency to pack so much into my calendar that my only option is to rush from thing to thing is very much the way that I've operated for a long time in my life. But I know that having wiggle room, having. White space, having margin margin's, the word I was looking for, that gives me energy.
Like, so the opposite of the rushing from thing to thing, the having the margin, having space, giving myself time, that gives me energy. But when I'm rushing it, it takes it, perfectionism, of course, drains my energy because specifically the kind of perfectionism where I'm kind of like. Spinning in a perfectionistic loop of trying to get something exactly right, and as I'm pursuing exactly right and perfect the mark of what is exactly right and perfect changes so that I can never achieve it, so that I keep getting more exhausted, frustrated with myself, and that I'm just spiraling, that definitely takes energy, the clutter of my children.
Plastic or random bits of things definitely drains my energy. It just, I would love to be the kind of person who feels at home with a level of I. Home clutter and chaos, but it really does make my skin crawl. I am hoping that maybe in like 10 years the way that I described trying to get my oldest down for a nap and how I feel like that's not an issue anymore.
Maybe someday I'll be. Speak about kid clutter in the same kind of like, oh, that chapter's over and I figured it out, and everything's okay kind of way. But right now there's stuff, the kid stuff, it's just, it gets to me in a way that I don't love about myself. So then it's like it isn't actually the clutter that's the problem.
The thing that really drains my energy is the way that I feel frustrated with myself for not being a cool, easy breezy mom who can just like either clean up after them without thinking like I'm not teaching them anything. Or just let them have their stuff everywhere. It's, it's a weird tension. And if you feel that way, then I'm sure you understand exactly what I'm saying.
And if you don't feel that way, then. Okay. The other thing that definitely takes my energy is having too much admin stuff and too much admin is sort of a catchall term that my best friend and I have been using all a lot lately because it just feels like. The administrative burden of a household, no matter how much support and resources you have, it ultimately does land on one person's shoulder.
I'm the secretary of the house and it's a lot, you know, it just is. And I also. Find that letting it build up to kind of like a critical mass is maybe not my best choice. So those are things again, you learn about your energy takers over time. You learn about your energy givers over time. Then you can adjust.
You can give yourself the margin, the support that you need, and on those energy givers, you can utilize them to give you a sense of momentum, give you a boost, and balance out some of those takers. Another thing that you could think about as. Terms of like the calendar and like the way the holidays might influence your energy.
So for me, my birthday always feels like a big energy giver. I don't know. I mean, we talked a lot about my birthday last year if you were along for the ride. I had a, a big 40th birthday. I had this like cherry theme, which I still feel very connected to and like I feel like it's my responsibility. As a 40-year-old woman to celebrate my birthday.
So it's not really about like other people as much as it is, like I just like celebrating my birthday. I feel special in the month of March. I feel like it's a good time to reflect and to set goals and to to be alone, but also be with people and I don't know, I just, I really like my birthday. Mother's Day, on the other hand, is a big energy taker.
It feels like work. It feels like I can't get it right, and I, I don't have my mother in my life. So that. Also adds a cloudiness and an energy drain to Mother's Day in that I don't really know the best way to move forward. Obviously, having a deep connection with my inner voice and my intuition, it gives me a sense of peace and comfort through Mother's Day, like knowing all is well and all of the beautiful like grounded centered things that.
Her voice gives us, and I do feel all of those things to be true, but the mental, like emotional side of me is just like, Ugh. You know, mother's Day is supposed to be this day to celebrate me. I'm the mom, but also we gotta make sure that we are celebrating the other moms. And then like some people can't be moms and I don't have a.
I can never find the right card to send my mom, or do I even want to send a card to my mom and is she gonna send me a card and is the card gonna make me sad? And all of the anticipation and consternation around Mother's Day, paired with the fact that my daughter. Her birthday is right around Mother's Day and always will be.
So then it's like birthday party and all that stuff. It's just like a lot. And so I know that about Mother's Day. It is an energy taker, an energy drainer, and so I can adjust my schedule and adjust my expectations on myself knowing that like I might have a different mood than I do around my birthday. So knowing your own personal energy givers and takers.
We'll give you that clarity that you need on your energy, but also on like what is worth your energy. Like I don't personally wanna pour a lot of effort and energy into more kid clutter. And so, you know, I think about that. I think about that around certain holidays, like when I'm purchasing toys or we're suggesting things to grandparents, like.
I try to aim for things that won't feel like clutter to me later. Right. And then I'm also trying to empower and encourage my children to have good like tidiness habits and things. But then also I'm trying to alleviate myself the stress of kid clutter by giving myself a alone time, you know? So it's like naming those things really can help you balance the scales a little bit.
It can help you embody your intentions in the life you're living by being honest about like what are the conditions in the season of life, the season in nature, your actual calendar, your, the ebb and flow of your days. Like if your mornings are really energy draining, then what can you do to make your evening's energy giving, just like really kind of looking at.
Creating a sense of balance, which was the word that we got in the cards for March. But you know, I, like I said, I think balance is a little bit of a trick, but in this case, it's like just kind of like softening the edges, rounding things out for yourself so that you can achieve your goals in a way that feels sustainable and true, because you're never really pushing past like your energy reserves in a way that's, that's too much.
So, like I said, this is something that you can play with as you're listening to this today. You can build on it over time. This isn't all like, these aren't fully baked ideas that I've had just forever. It's like, as I started to consider this concept more and more I've been able to pinpoint certain things as energy givers and energy takers, and then tweak them, play with them.
Maybe you start by just identifying all of your energy and givers as you go about your day. Like as things are happening, you could be like, Hmm, that's a giver, that's a taker. You know, just kind of like playing with it. Or you could just name one and dive deep into it. Like, why is this the thing that's giving me energy?
How can I enhance that? How can I use it to my advantage? How can I make it even juicier to, to give me more energy? And then just play with it more and more from there? Just see how naming and exploring these things helps you understand your own personal energy more and how you can support yourself through the takers.
Use the givers to your benefit and to your advantage. And yeah, let me know how it goes. Send me a message on Instagram. I'm at Kale Elise, you message me on Voxer if you're a current client. This is one of the exercises we will go through in spring forward. We'll go through it in a, a pretty like actionable, tangible way.
Sign up now via the link in the show notes to join us for spring forward. And if you have any questions or just need to connect, you know where to find me. I'll be back next week with an episode about shifting from winter to spring because it is happening and I'll be sharing rituals, practices and mindset shifts.
To help you find the momentum you're craving without feeling like you're just jumping back on that toxic and all too familiar productivity hamster wheel. I will talk to you then.
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Come find me in the DMs, I’m @kaileenelise
Heeeey! I’m Kaileen Elise Sues.
Former HR girlie, failed SAHM, fresh 40-something. Your favorite coach and voice of calm with useful practices, intuitive insights, and small shifts that make a real impact.
My approach isn't about forcing you onto a proven path. It's about helping you break through emotional blocks and discover your true north. Because it’s about time you embraced your deepest wisdom and started living the life of your dreams.
