I Might Not Be Cut Out for the Truth
Posted by Kaileen Elise on October 7th, 2009
Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.
(Martin Luther King, Jr.)
Two weeks ago, I finished reading Chapter 2 in Martha Beck’s The Joy Diet. The mission seemed simple enough—continue to develop a relationship with nothing while incorporating one moment of truth each day.
Beck’s words are inspiring and relentlessly truthful. When I completed the chapter, I felt as though I was ready to embrace the truth—ready to uncover secrets and grow from my discoveries.
Shortly after these feelings of I-can-conquer-the-world-ness, reality smacked me in the face in the form of to-do lists, appointments and special projects. Then the excuses came and I let them defeat me.
Maybe the excuses are right, maybe I don’t have time for the truth.
I find it a bit depressing and otherwise hilarious that I am struggling so much with this Joy Diet journey. My nothing was far from perfect, I avoided the truth and I have put desire on the backburner. Beck is right when she says that, “living behind a pane of glass, numbing and empty though it is, also feels safe.”
As I think about how I want the rest of this journey to unfold, I am faced with a challenge—do I want to continue hiding behind a pane of glass or do I want to trust there is another step below the one I am standing on?
photo credit: me
Tags: Everyday Life, Joy
This is such a well written post on the struggles that come along with the The Joy Diet. The tasks each week really are difficult and force us to make changes that shatter the glass piece by piece. Although I was able to tackle truth last week and this week, I must admit that it has been one of the most painful and heart wrenching weeks of my life. Being truthful hurts.
Is there a way that you can do truth and chip away at the truth in small portions. Perhaps not daily, but what about weekly or monthly?
I think I might make truth less of a daily thing and more of weekly thing as time progresses.
Your photo is absolutely gorgeous.
Honestly, Nothing, Truth, and Desire is my entire first year of school. It’s really hard inner work. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Awareness is the first step…and you have that
i agree with the other lovely ladies. you do have awareness and that is a huge first step. the joy diet definitely isn’t easy but i know that we will all gain so much from it in the end and will be SO worth it. enjoy the journey my friend.
I actually had such an easy time with Nothing, a struggle with Truth and I’m having a heck of a time with Desire…I thought this would be a piece of cake but it’s not! Speaking of cake, when do we get to the treats chapter?
wow ladies-thank you for the support.
elle, like the idea of doing a monthly truth check-in of sorts. maybe i can gradually bring it to a higher frequency.
nica & melita, i’m glad to have you in my corner. thanks for your kind and inspirational words.
maryam, i can’t wait for treats! the name alone makes me smile
All of the ladies are right and I’m with Maryam … waiting for the cake!
I’m looking at Desire today. Wonder what I’ll find?!!!